Would that it were mine, well, it would be on the cover of Paper instead of sitting here writing in defense of hers.
Would I pose glistening and naked? But do I think as a wife and mother Kim is beholden to some absurd notion Nude dance contests postnatal propriety, as some Glee cast members and other folks with wag-happy fingers seem to?
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Most of them will be moms one day. We Americans like our moms and wives a certain way, for the most part. We like them in minivans and on the sidelines—spread the Jif, not the legs. Just look at our Lesbians eatting out which have come a long way, even in my adulthood.
No, we want that. We want postpartum bikini bodies and the jogging skirts that maintain them—marionettes on puppet strings, in G-strings, if you believe DirecTV.
We fetishize famous moms throughout and after the gestational Mom fucks bbc bump watch to bounce back, and the faster the better. Remember how hideously we treated Kim when she was pregnant?
We are okay with—enthusiastic about? We do not like them dancing dirty. We do not like them acting flirty.
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We do not like them in the nude. Surely a mo-om say it in your best multi-syllabic teenage voice should not be getting a bikini wax.
Or perching a crystal coupe on her behind while an arc of bubbly squirts suggestively over her head. So in a few Kinky boots font, do I officially enter some sort of Sisterhood of the Sexless, whereby we stop celebrating the very thing that made us mothers in the first place?
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Grab the twinset and pop the chardonnay! For whatever else you can say about her, at least Kim is putting forth—very, very forth—the person she always has been, before baby and now beyond. What about when North grows up? Will she be embarrassed? If she wants to strip down in a puddle of sequins, baby oil and champagne, great. Maybe some moms will feel sexually reinvigorated or newly liberated by Kim. For anyone who prefers not to see all of Kim, make Stories of orgies a breastfeeding scold and look the other way.
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Is It Enough? What Happened?
Ideas sexuality Butt Out! In Defense of Hot Moms. Jean-Paul Goude—Paper.
By Claire Howorth. TIME Ideas hosts the world's leading voices, providing commentary on events in news, society, and culture.
We welcome outside contributions. Opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect the views of TIME editors. Related Stories. Already a print subscriber?
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